After moments of stillness of emotions, my classmates and I decided to break the silence... (Note: This post is a continuation of my prevous post "Mocking Plastics")

Our Recollection was scheculed last saturday, right after the postponed "Oral Defense" of our Thesis. I was anxious about that day. In fact, I was haunted the whole week by my hallucinations. My imaginations ran wild. I know that the retreat session might end up not-so-very-nice...well, I was wrong.

After long but stiking lectures from a seminarian from Negros, we eagerly went to the place where all the fight and misunderstandings happened, our very own classroom. We decided to continue with a Open Forum with all my classmates.

Yes, the Mocking Plastics whom I talked about in my last post were present. I didn't feel any tension at all. Not because I thought I was on the right side, but because I was ready to be judged, true or not true, it's easy to tell what's true.

I could not even believe that Regie Ann, whom my Nanay-nanayan in our room told me about (Regie Ann hates me daw ever since, my Nanay-nanayan told me) , said sorry for me for all her mistakes. I knew she had short-comings sometimes and I realized that it was time for me to be patient with her weaknesses. I wasn't rude and selfish, I just didn't understand her that time, and she didn't appreciate me either. So it was a bit of a mess. Confusing as it is, let's proceed with the forum. When it was my turn to speak, I told them every word that I wanted them to realize. First I didn't name the persons involved with my issue, I was scared that I might hurt them, and they might hurt me too. But gladly we talked about it with patience and maturity (because we're not the same ol' kids anymore--the worst kids in high school as the teachers perceived). My problems with the Mocking Plastics were solved. They said "SORRY", and I quickly accepted the apology. I explained to them, the words that I have practiced in front of the mirror...and it worked! Corz, a successful reconcilation with my friends wouldn't be possible without prayer. I prayed every night just to get my nerves eased!

I apologized too, even though if I didn't do anything to them, but you know, kasama na 'dun yung irritations nila. Maybe I might have not noticed them, irritated na pala with my openess to the class. But it was okay. Mas mabigat yung kasalanan nila sa 'kin and I didn't have the right to ignore them and so I easily forgave them. I promised the plastics-turned-friends that I wouldn't do anything that might humiliate them, I'm going to double my time in studying. They promised me that they wouldn't throw their mean and unreasonable comments on me again (especially if it's a bit personal and physical).

After the reconcilation, guess what?! We went to the Talabahan, we call oysters as talaba. Really a nice treat for the newly-reconciled ! We ate talaba the rest of the day! Yum!

What I've learned?

1. That it's not so hard to say sorry, if it really comes from the heart. If we really mean "sorry", it simply means that we accept our mistakes, READ: WHOLE-HEARTEDLY ! If it feels hard to say sorry to a friend that hurt you so bad, and so did she, maybe it's time to learn how to EAT PRIDE. It's not that delicious but once you've swallowed it, believe me you'll never regret.

2. How important friendship is! It's a gift! Friends are gifts, not curses. We tend to feel that they are a nuisance but mind you, you won't be you without them. They drive us weak to the bones with their pranks and backbites but, you know what? They're defense mechanisms, which means they backbite because they lack outlets of their emotions. Got it? Outlet-kung saan pinapalabasan ng galit, disappointment and sadness. That's why pests exist. What we should do? Not keep our mouths shut, tell them. Know the right approach, timing. Just like in Taekwondo (the sport I'm in), I can't hit the armour of my opponent if I don't posses calmness, timing and aggresiveness. Be aggressive in a positive way and go get your friends back. BUT...there's a BIG BUT! There are circumstances wherein we can't fix everything, we're just human beings! So sometimes there are words that should be left unsaid (as I've said and stated: it depends on the circumstance).

Hope that my kapwa blogistas learned something from my simple post. I just want to share my innermost thoughts on the latest issues of my life. After all, that's what friends and blogs are for...outlets.